America, We Need To Talk

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America, we need to talk.

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What the fuck happened last night? I’m sorry about the language, but I’m a little miffed. Actually no, I’m distraught, shaken and disappointed. I’m sure you understand. Last night, we the people, elected Donald J. Trump as our 45th president. The same guy who said this back in June:

When do we beat Mexico at the border? They’re laughing at us—at our stupidity. And now they’re beating us economically. They are not our friend. Believe me.

…When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best. They’re not sending you (points to someone in the audience). They’re not sending you (points again, at another audience member). They’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people. But I speak to border guards and they tell us what we’re getting and it only makes common sense. It only makes common sense. They’re sending us not the right people. It’s coming from more than Mexico. It’s coming from all over South and Latin America. And it’s coming probably, probably from the Middle East.

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To be clear: That shit is racist. Not only is it racist, it’s not accurate. I know accuracy and facts aren’t of great concern to someone like Trump (or at least they weren’t during this election cycle), but I thought facts, accuracy and not being a racist asshole was important to America. I was wrong. What’s important is that white, working-class Americans keep their privilege in tact and preserve their way of life. That much is evident. Thanks for the clarification, everyone.

You know what really bugs me, though? When people question why Trump’s comments on Mexicans bother me so much since I’m “not really Mexican.” These people say things like, “But you’re not an ‘illegal.’ You were born here. He wasn’t talking about you. You’re American. You’re educated and well spoken. He didn’t mean you.”

I guess what those people don’t realize (aside from the fact that “you’re so well spoken” isn’t a compliment) is that my parents are Mexican immigrants. Sure, they’re American citizens now, but their roots are Mexican and thus, so are mine.

Ironically, my roots are also pretty damn American. I mean, I’m the daughter of immigrants who came to the US, worked really hard and saved their money. They had two kids, bought a great house in a good neighborhood and are currently living out the American Dream. That’s where I come from. Plus I’m 62% Native American (on a count of me being Mexican and all) and I have the Ancestry.com DNA test results to prove it. I’m like the most American thing ever.

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Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I also feel like I’m a pretty decent American to boot. I care about the future of my country and everyone in it. I monitor the political process. I look for ways to get involved in and help out in my city. I support local businesses. I don’t mind paying more to buy American. I pay my taxes. I try not to be a dick and I say please and thank you. With that said, I’ve been told to “go back to my country” or “go back to my ancestral land” more during this election than at any other time in my life.

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What’s that? You’re not a racist? You voted Trump because you wanted to flip “The System” a big ol’ bird? No kiddin’. You feel like you’re invisible, like you don’t matter anymore, like your rights are trampled every chance someone gets? That’s interesting because you guys (working, middle-class white folks) are still the ones that benefit most from every system in place, everywhere, all the time. You need the system and you know it, so you sold the rest of us out in order to maximize your benefit. Fuck. Off.

You over there, you say voted Trump because you think America needs to be great again? Save your thinly veiled racism, dick face. At least the assholes I described in the paragraph above didn’t realize they were being racist pricks. You’re a racist prick and you can’t even admit it you yourself, let alone me. Go to hell.

Or, maybe you voted Trump because you think he’s the only one in touch with the everyman. If that’s the case, then you’re more naïve than I thought was humanly possible. This man is a billionaire, real estate mogul turned reality TV star. He was born rich, grew up wealthy and built a deeply flawed, but highly lucrative empire. What, pray tell, do you think you have in common with that? Oh never mind, I’m sure Trump appreciates every last vote anyway. He probably appreciates you picking up the tab every year on April 15th more, asshole.

I’m so disappointed in you, America. I thought we were a better country than this. I knew we had our problems, everyone does. I wasn’t some idealistic jerk-off who thought we’d conquered racism, classism and sexism. I’m a realist. You know that. I understand that our relationship is ever evolving. I know we’re supposed to work together to improve. How could I forget? What I didn’t know was how quickly so many of you would throw the most vulnerable among us to the wolves, just so you could get a leg up on the rat race or claim whatever you think is rightfully yours. Aren’t you the ones that keep telling me that this life, this world, this country doesn’t owe me shit?

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

I’d apologize for my language again, but since we’re all so enamored with “telling it like it is,” I figure you don’t mind. I mean, last night you made it pretty clear that I may love my country, but my country doesn’t necessarily love me back the way I need. Well, fuck that and fuck you. I’ve always had your back, and last night you pushed me in front of the train to save yourself–you selfish bastard. I’m still not sure how to process that. Hopefully writing it down will help.

I just want you to know that it will always be you, America, but right now I need some time.

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